Margie here. So many people have asked me what Edna, my sister, is really like so I'm here to tell you. I have a pitcher of Special Tea and Edna has gone to old Biddy's so I can do as I please.
The first thing I did was dig the Miami Herald out of the garbage. I saw Edna reading it and marking attractions she'd like to visit. Lord a mercy! I had to cover my eyes several times. Edna is shameless.
I'm ashamed to say my sister first went to this section called Voyeur. Heavens above! She has circled where it says, "400+ Nightclubs." I know Edna well enough to know she'll try to visit as many of them as she can. Edna is a hussy.
My stars! Would you look at these shops she's circled? She'll go down there and spend every dime she's got. She doesn't care that her sister is sitting here and can barely afford to cook a pot of beans! Edna is selfish.
Finally, I see Edna has circled all the beaches. I suppose she thinks everybody has a great interest in seeing her old wrinkled tushie spread out all over the place. Edna in a bathing suit is a sight best left unseen. Edna is an idiot!
I can't take anymore. The thought of my sister cavorting in Miami is enough to make me barf. I'm going to Bailey's and get a smooth drink to coat my churning stomach.
Edna is on her own.