Last Summer Picnic

Margie: Edna, Fall is coming soon so we'll be stuck in the house more. I'm thinking we should go on one last picnic.

Remember when Daddy would load up the car and Mama would pack our lunch and we'd all go down to Skeeter's Creek? Let's make a plan sister.

Edna: You know, that's actually a wonderful idea! What did you have in mind to make for our picnic?

Margie: I thought I'd make potato salad and baked beans to go with some homemade BBQ shoulder. Why don't you make those nice deviled eggs and cheesecake you always make for the church suppers?

Edna: Oh, sounds lovely, I think I will. We ought to invite Cousin T along, don't you think?

Margie: If we do that, Edna, we'd best leave the special tea at home or the boy won't be able to drive us back. Maybe we'd best make extra food too. I never saw anybody who could devour food like Cousin T does. He'll eat anything.

Which means that he'll eat all your eggs and cheesecake so I won't have to.

Edna: Margie, you can bet your bottom dollar that I won't be cooking anything for this picnic if you're just going to sit and insult me. Maybe I ought to just go on a picnic by myself if you're going to be hateful.

Margie: Look at the pot calling the kettle black. I think you should picnic by yourself because you're just an old grouch.

I'll go with Cousin T and you let me know if you want to rent my car.

Edna: Oh, you'd just love it if I didn't go, wouldn't you? Well, I'm going along just to spite you. And I'll make my deviled eggs and cheesecake, but you're not getting any. How do you like them apples, you old crow?

Margie: Lord knows I'd rather eat crow as your old eggs. They cause me to backfire worse than the car does.

Edna: My lands, woman, you must be off your gol-durn meds! You're the one who suggested I make the deviled eggs in the first place, you loony.

That's it, I'm counting to ten because the doctor told me to watch my blood pressure. You'd best be out of this room before I get to ten or I won't be held responsible for what happens next.