Monday, August 10, 2009

Why?

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Margie: Edna, you always brag about how smart you are and how you could have joined MENSA. Here's your chance to prove it. I'm going to ask you two questions. Let's see just how smart you are.

Here's the first one, nitwit. How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

Edna: Good Lord, Margie, why are you asking me these questions before I've even had my Geritol? Fine, if you absolutely must have an answer, then I'd say they get into those enclosed light fixtures by sheer determination alone. Or maybe they're suicidal, how the heck should I know?

Margie: Lying liar. I knew you wouldn't know. Look at this everybody- Edna lies about how she could be in MENSA. I think I'll call them and tell them you're making them look back.

Do you want one more chance to answer a question before I dub you the Eternal Nitwit?

Edna: What I want is an apology, you cabbage head. Go ahead and ask your second question, but I reserve the right to refuse to answer.

Margie: Question two for the fruit loop coming up.

Edna, why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Edna: That's an easy one, it's because it would get tangled up in the vines as he swung from tree to tree. Who's the fruit loop now, you old crow?

Margie: Lord a mercy, Edna, you're dumb as a stump. I suppose you think he went to Wal-Mart of the jungle and bought razors?

Edna: I'm not the one sitting around all day thinking up these idiot questions. Kiss my grits, you moron.

9 comments:

Grampy said...

Good Morning Ladies
It is always fun stopping by to visit. Nice to see two people getting along so well.

Stephanie B said...

(1) Bug are part of the light fixture's manufacturing process, with their guts used as sealant. However, over time, that substance gets brittle and break away to fall to the bottom. (Few light fixtures are truly air tight - most have holes large enough for screws. Chances are, those bugs are crawly bugs that stumbled into the light fixture and never made it out).

(2) Effective make-up artist. For purity to the role, the actor never shaved, but the makeup artist did a great job of caking the hair with pancake makeup and molding it until it just looked like a very firm chin. (There are people, like most Native Americans, and several groups in Asia and Africa, who grow little or no facial hair. Such a background would certainly provide an explanation, though there's no hint of anything of the kind in the novels. I don't know that they even mention facial hair on Tarzan, but it's been a while).

I don't need a MENSA membership. I'm not a joiner.

gLoR!e said...

Good, I stopped by here. it made me smile which this day i hardly doing it for some stomach reasons..heheh I always find funny both of you! Keep laughing!:)

Mik said...

Didn't Tarzan carry a big sharp knife? He could've used that for shaving, now where he got the Nair to remove the rest of his body hair is another question.

Dian said...

I have had conversations like this with my DH!

Dian
www.groceryshopforfree.com

Bring Back Pluto said...

I enjoyed the banter! Fun stuff!
Bring back Pluto
"ONE of THE GUYS"

reojames said...

Hey Margie and Edna! I just wanted to stop by and say "Thanks!" for your nice comment about my Natalie Wood art, so ... Thanks!

KAT said...

I used to love Johnny Weismuller and I don't care that he didn't have a beard....LOL

Take care Ladies!
Kat

Kath Lockett said...

Both questions are good ones, ladies.

Here's another one for you - why does Tarzan have moobs? (man boobs - check 'em out)

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