Friday, March 20, 2009
Margie: Edna, that's the last par-tay you'll ever talk me into. I never saw such a mess in my life. I'm not cleaning all this up. It looks like a swarm of locusts came through here.
There's not a scrap of food left, all the Special tea is gone, and somebody even stole my bottle of cough medicine. Lordy, my head hurts. And, to top it all off, I found some bloomers hanging in the bathroom and they don't belong to me or you!
Edna: Margie, please stop shrieking at me, my head hurts too. You know, I thought our guests would be much better behaved than that. Maybe putting "clothing optional" on the invitation attracted the wrong sort of crowd...
I just can't clean anything until I feel better. I'm going back to bed with my hot water bottle and a bicarbonate of soda, you can just cool your jets until I recover.
Margie: Oh no, Edna, no bed until I'm finished with you. You just had to convince Silly Willy and Fluffy to bring their cotton candy machine. There is so much cotton candy all over the kitchen that I can't even make my coffee.
Let's talk about Miss Lidian. She got into your hope chest and cut all the ads out of your magazines that you've been saving since 1930. I found her droppings in the trash can.
When I tell you what Cousin T has done then we may as well both go back to bed.
Edna: Oh Lord, do I even want to know what that boy did? I told you to cut him off after that 4th cup of special tea! You know, Miss Maitri brought her pugs along to the party, and they were much better behaved than our human guests.
Margie, was I hallucinating or did I see Miss Fashiona dancing with Jensen Ackles while wearing a pair of these?
Edna: I honestly don't remember much that happened after Rich started that conga line. The rest of the party is kind of a blur...
Margie: The pugs were well-behaved for sure. Edna, that was Rich wearing Fashiona's shoes. Frankly, I wouldn't be caught dead in those things.
You think Dbalcer is sweet? I caught her on the porch steps with a jug of milk and she'd swiped our stash of Oreos.
Cousin T wins the prize, Edna. That boy has put up all our Christmas decorations. Lordy, where's my bed?
Edna: Our Christmas decorations? Oh thank goodness, I thought those blinking lights I kept seeing were pixies. My lands, what a party.
You know, Dbalcer is asleep on the couch, and I spotted kricka passed out in the front yard. Should we wake them up to help us clean? Miss Amy said she'd help us clean too, but we have to pay her in bacon.
Margie: Yes, Edna, wake them up. When the house is clean then wake me up. Tell Amy to kiss my bacon!