National Sleep Comfort Month

Margie: Edna, it says here in the paper that this is National Sleep Comfort Month. I can tell them a few things about sleep comfort! First, you need a good mattress and box springs. Next, you put freshly laundered bedclothes on the bed. Third, you take a hot bath and lotion up your body. Finally, put your dang earplugs in if you're like me and have a sister who snores like a freight train.

Edna:  You know what would make me sleep comfortably, sister?  You sleeping in another house completely!  I'm afraid to go to sleep at night lest you come rummage in my belongings for something to pawn. 

I'm with you on the freshly laundered bedclothes.  There's nothing like slipping into a bed made with fresh sheets.  Even better if they've been dried on the clothesline outside.  Reminds me of the good old days when we'd help Mama with the laundry.  Margie, remember that time she made you pin up all the wet laundry by yourself as punishment for breaking my baby doll?  That was a nice day.

Margie: Edna, no pawn shop would buy that junk you call treasure. I didn't break your dang doll. Mama wouldn't believe me when I said Mrs. Pastor's son did it.

I'll tell you how to have the most comfortable night's sleep ever, sister. Get in between those freshly laundered sheets with a freshly showered gentleman like Jensen Ackles!

Edna:  Well, isn't that just a typical floozy solution from you!  I think I'm going to stick with warm milk with honey before bed, and leave the catting around to the likes of you.  Just don't disturb my sleep, you hear me??

Margie: Edna, jealousy has never become you. I can help you sleep once I get my pistol.