Viva Las Vegas

Margie: Edna, get in here. I've got big news. Betty Lou just called and said she's won a trip for 2 to Las Vegas. She's invited me to go with her.

I'm making a list of things you need to do while I'm gone. I can't trust you to take care of things unless I make you a list.

Edna: Oh happy day, she'll be out of my hair and in a whole other state for---wait, how long are you going to be gone?

And if I weren't such a lady, I would tell you what to do with your list.

Margie: Edna, if I wasn't a lady, I'd chain you to your bed while I'm gone.

Don't you worry about how long I'll be gone. You just know I can return at any time so you behave yourself. Here's your list.

Edna: Margie, you can just take that ding-dang list with you to Vegas, I sure won't be looking at it. I'll run the house how I see fit while you're gone, and if you don't like it then nuts to you.

I wonder if I should call Betty Lou and warn her that she's picked a harpy for a traveling companion?

Margie: Edna, you do that. I won't feel bad then about not sharing any of my winnings.

Deal or no deal?

Edna: Margie, if you bring home any winnings I will eat my Sunday bonnet. Knowing you, anything you do win will be spent on tips at one of those beefcake reviews.

But listen up, sister: if I catch wind of you going behind my back and using any of MY money on this trip into the den of iniquity, you will not be allowed back in this house. You hear me?

Margie: What did you say about beefcake reviews?

Edna: Oh, good Lord. You go pack, I'm going to go warn--er, call Betty Lou.