Margie: Edna, I'm sick and tired of us going to Bailey's Tavern every Saturday night and being the only non- football addicts there. We can learn a little bit about the game so we can converse intelligently with folks.
You come sit down and let's watch this game on TV. Mr. Hawkins has taught me a few things about it and we're not too old to learn more.
Edna: Margie, I'm not so sure that I want to converse with those hooligans down at Bailey's about football, they're always shouting and rough-housing. But I'll give it a try if you think it's a good idea.
Did Mr. Hawkins tell you why the ball isn't round? That has always stumped me.
Margie: Edna, Mr. Hawkins is a smart man. He said the ball is shaped like that because it will fly through the air like a missile. I must say, though, that I don't understand why that young man who throws the ball is called a quarterback.
Edna, how does he play with a bad back like that?
Edna: Margie, they probably don't literally mean a quarter of a back, but it beats me what that name really means. This whole game is a mystery to me, I tell you what. I don't understand why they keep knocking each other over like that, it's very rude.
But to tell you the truth, what I really want to know is why they call that one player a "tight end". They all look like tight ends in those tight pants, that's for sure.
Margie: Edna, I see your point. Why don't we forget learning about football and study these tight ends in more detail? You get the special tea and I'll make popcorn!
Edna: It's a deal, sister.
*photo courtesy NYPL Digital Gallery
