Wednesday Thought

mon

Where's our money??

Edna: Margie, I tell you what, I am just stumped as to how bloggers make any money with their blogs. You're forever seeing some blogger going on and on about "monetizing" this and that, but I'm starting to think they're all full of hooey. We certainly haven't had much luck so far with this monetizing thing, maybe we need to think outside the box. Winter's here and I need to raise some funds for socks and mittens.

Margie: I know what you mean, sister. I need flannel bloomers and new socks plus another blanket for my bed. I think it's hooey too.

Maybe now you'd like to entertain my notion of selling nekkid pictures?

Edna: Oh, good grief. Margie, I refuse to make money by objectifying handsome young men, I don't care how willing they are.

I was thinking maybe we could hold a widget yard sale. I'm sure we've got a few over there in the sidebar just gathering dust.

Margie: Edna, I was talking about nekkid pictures of ME. Yes, we could have a widget yard sale or we could have a Special Tea stand out by the road.

Maybe people would send donations if they saw a picture of my holey bloomers.

Edna: As much as I hate to admit it, you might be on to something there. We could put up a picture of you and people could pay us to take it down. Goodness knows no one wants to see you and your holey bloomers, let alone you IN your holey bloomers.

Oh, I know! Maybe we could find us a wealthy sponsor, and they could pay us one dollar every time we insulted each other. My lands, we'd be millionaires in no time!

Margie: Edna, did you insult me? How do you know who might want to see my bloomers?

Margie: I like that sponsor idea. Who will sponsor me to duct tape Edna's mouth so we don't have to listen to her nonsense?

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Don't forget to email us your guesses for the "Guess our Ages" contest, only five days left to enter!

Old Lady Jewelry

Margie: Edna, have you seen all these talented people making and selling jewelry? Why can't we do that and make some extra money? You could go buy the stuff, we'll make some jewelry, then we'll split the money. How about it?

Edna: Margie, if you think I'm going to bankroll the entire project and then give you half the money, you are sorely mistaken. Either that, or you've had too much special tea today.

I do admire folks who make that beautiful jewelry we see on people's blogs. I'm not sure my old hands are nimble enough any more to make anything anyone would want to buy.

Margie: We don't have to make jewelry, Edna. Maybe we could make things that would be easy on your old hands.

How about key chains? We could put our picture on one side and a nekkid man on the other. How about that? I'll go look for nekkid men pictures.
Edna: Good God A'mighty, you and your nekkid men! Do you honestly think that anyone's going to want to buy a key chain with a nekkid man on one side and two old ladies on the other? I'm not sure we want to cater to that kind of clientele.

Margie: You hurt my feelings you old fool. You just make what you want and leave me out of it.

I'm going in my room and look at my photo albums. I hope you're a happy dingbat. Hussy.

Edna: Margie, that is just like you! You have some grandiose idea but it has to be done YOUR way. Then when someone raises some reasonable objections, you pitch a mighty fit. Well fine, go ahead and sulk in your room--at least I'll have some peace and quiet today.

Folks, I tell you what, if you ever see my sister coming your way with her packed suitcases, you just shut off the lights and pretend you're not home.

Dollar General

Margie: Edna, I'm glad to see that our Dollar General store has enlarged their grocery section. I can usually get more there for my money. How about you ?

Edna: If I wanted groceries, I'd go down to Gracie Leigh's. Nothing's changed around her store in nigh on 30 years.

Margie: Lord a mercy, Edna, you're just stuck in the past.

Edna: I do dislike change. I'm going to write a letter.

Margie: Who cares if you write one, nitwit? You're nobody's boss.

Edna: I like it when things are plain and simple, why do companies always have to make "improvements" that aren't really improvements at all?

Margie: I wish somebody would improve your foul temper. You act just you did when you had PMS.

Edna: Kiss my grits, Margie.

Fun Friday

Margie: Every time Edna gets mad at me, which is more often than she'd admit, she always tells me that I'm not worth a plugged nickel. Has anybody ever told you that?

Here's something fun that should set the record straight. Just wait until Edna sees this. Try it for yourself.

Want to see how much you're really worth? Take this fun quiz and set people straight.

Hear this, Edna! My worth is $2,380,042.00. Eat your heart out. Too bad you can't sell me.

So, how much are you worth?

Margie's School of Romance

Margie: Edna, you know men have changed. They used to be gentlemen but men of today have lost their sense of romance. I believe in education so I'm going to start teaching classes in the basement.

Margie's School of Romance
Opening Soon
For gentlemen of all ages

Edna: Margie, I don't think you're qualified to be teaching that class. I think you'd better offer a money-back guarantee, because I know you're going to have some unsatisfied customers.

Margie: Edna, I haven't had an unsatisfied customer yet. Don't you remember how it felt when you got a lovely letter from a nice gentleman? I'm talking about a letter praising your virtues? Forget it, you don't have any.

Edna: As everyone in Jericho knows, there is no lady more virtuous than I am, so I surely would enjoy receiving a letter from a nice gentleman. I wouldn't want one from the men in your class though; anyone who looks to you for guidance about romance would have to be off their rocker.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Ask Margie and Edna

Okay folks, here’s your chance to get some advice from Jericho’s #1 gossip mavens. Do you have a question for Margie and Edna? Submit your questions, and Margie and Edna will tackle your toughest problems and concerns.

Send your questions to sweettea1@myway.com. Put “Ask Margie and Edna” in the subject line. We reserve the right to edit questions for length, spelling, etc. Please bear in mind, it’s possible that not all questions will be selected to be answered. Keep watching this space, maybe Margie and Edna will answer your question next!

Disclaimer: This is for entertainment purposes only. "Margie" and "Edna" are not real people, so please don't send us questions about serious issues. And please don't send us questions that you'd be better off asking a professional, as we are not qualified to answer such questions.