Margie, Get Your Gun

Margie: Here's a picture of me when I was a few years younger than I am now. I was quite the markslady back then and you should have seen that fella run when I told him to get away from me or I'd fill him full of buckshot!

Anyway, it's the time of year when networks start renewing or cancelling our favorite shows so my picture best remind them that I don't cotton to my shows being cancelled. Just look how they treated Jericho! Margie has not forgotten. You hear me, CBS?

Here's a friendly warning to Fox. Don't you dare cancel my Alcatraz! You got that? I enjoy Jorge Garcia and I want you to leave him alone!

Who's next? CW, listen up. I absolutely love Ringer and you cancel it and I'll be ringing you! You don't want me to get angry. Just ask Edna.

I think my other show are safe. Oh, CBS, I want Jericho back too. Idjits!

It's that time again

 

Edna: Margie, when was the last time you dusted off this television set? It's like it's barely been used all summer. 

Margie: Edna, there's nothing good on summer television. I'd rather sit on the porch or sunbathe or hang out at Bailey's. When was the last time you did any dusting anyway? 

Edna: Well, I'm dusting now. Don't you know what time of year this is? It's fall premiere time! My lands, the way you complain about summer television, I would have thought you'd be counting down the days. I'm excited about our old favorites coming back, like Castle, but there are some good-looking new shows this year too. Have you heard about Ringer? It's got that "Buffy" girl and it looks very suspenseful. Oh, and it has that lovely Nestor Carbonell from LOST, too. 

Margie: I know exactly what time of year it is and I have my shows already scheduled. I don't know anything about a Ringer but that Secret Circle looks good. So does Person of Interest. I have to watch Dancing With The Stars even though I hate that show. You know how I love Nancy Grace so I'll be rooting for her. I hope she doesn't shame me. 

Edna: You tolerated me watching DWTS when mon cher Gilles was on, so I guess I can afford you the same favor. Just don't expect me to call and vote for her, in case there's someone I like better. There's a few comedies I'm looking forward to, like Suburgatory and New Girl. I know you don't like sit-coms, but if I can watch all those boring documentaries you like, then you can sit still long enough for me to watch something funny. 

Margie: Okay, you can watch those silly comedies but I'm putting in my ear plugs! You know, sister, we could get one of those DVR's if you weren't so stingy. I could watch Body of Proof, Unforgettable, and Anarchy when I pleased. I hate they're all on at the same time. It's odd that you like funny TV shows when you're always so sour. 

Edna: Just to show you how sweet I really am, I'll dip into my pin money to pay for a DVR. I consider it money well spent if it means you'll stop griping at me. Good Lord woman, close your mouth. You're attracting flies.

Where are all the good new TV shows??

Edna: Margie, I'm a little underwhelmed by this season's new TV shows. I haven't seen anything yet that I couldn't live without. What about you?

Margie: I sure haven't seen much for sure. Actually, the only new show I like is that FlashForward on ABC. I wish I could have a flash forward so I'd be able to see if I ever have any peace from your big mouth.

Edna: Well, guess what? I saw MY flash forward and six months from now I'm sitting on a beach in Tahiti sipping mojitos with a handsome young man, and you're nowhere in sight. How do you like them apples, sister?

I like that FlashForward show too, I suppose it's interesting enough. But I sure don't think it's the next LOST like everyone keeps saying it is. This season's crop of new shows just isn't grabbing me like my old favorites still do. I tried to give The Forgotten a try (because it has that nice young man on it that so reminds me of Deputy Jimmy), but it's not holding my attention much so far. I think it's bound for cancellation, and I won't be mailing any peanuts to anyone to save it, that's for sure.

Margie: Happy day! You'll be gone soon and I'm moving all my young men into this house. Margie's playmates. Yee haw!!

I watched a little bit of that Good Wife but it's just not for me. I do like her husband. Wonder why they didn't call it The Good Husband? No peanuts from me either.

Edna: It figures you'd like the husband, isn't he supposed to have been a philanderer? Mama always lamented over your floozy ways, you know.

There haven't been many good prospects for sit-coms this fall either, come to think of it. I tried watching that Modern Family but I found it too uncomfortable to watch. That's supposed to be a comedy? I am enjoying Glee quite a bit, which is kind of funny and quirky, but it has a soap opera-ish facet to it that I'm finding surprisingly unenjoyable.

Margie, perhaps we're just too old to fit the network demographics anymore.

Margie: Maybe I'll just stick to watching my Sons of Anarchy too. You're too old for anything, Edna.

Edna: I'm not too old to be your YOUNGER sister, you harpy.

So readers, what do you all think are the hits and duds of the Fall TV season so far?

M&E's TV Rant

Edna: Margie, I am plumb fed up, and for once it doesn't have anything to do with you.

Margie: In that case, Edna, tell me all about it. I'm all ears.

Edna: Thank you, Margie. I swan, I'm so upset about this, I think I might need a cup of special tea. Maybe two.

Those dang fool networks are at it again, they're canceling my favorite shows! First ABC decided that they weren't going to order any more episodes of Pushing Daisies (and we all know what that means). Then, NBC decided to get in on the act and they canceled My Own Worst Enemy. What's going to go next? Chuck? Fringe? Heaven forbid, Supernatural??

Margie, it's getting to the point that I don't even want to watch new shows any more. What's the point? I find something I like, and then the networks cancel it. It's all about the ratings and their advertisers, TV executives sure don't care about their real customers: the viewers.

Margie: I need special tea too because I agree with you and that's scary.

I mainly watch cable now and you should too. Cancel Supernatural? Edna, I'd make their life a living Hades. I'd put a voodoo curse on those idiots.

Maybe we should just rent some of those men movies. You know the ones.

Edna: Margie, you never cease to amaze me. And I don't mean that in a good way.

I think we'd better start looking up voodoo curses, because I have a feeling things on TV are going to get worse before they get better.

Margie: I'm with you, sister. How does The Margie and Edna Network sound?

Edna: Sounds good to me!