Edna's House Rules

Margie: Cousin T, thank you so much for staying with me while Edna is gone. I get a little scared after dark.

Cousin T: (nodding and smiling)

Now, Edna did want me to give you the house rules because you'll be sleeping in her bedroom. I know it's a little fancy for you but just make do. Let me read the rules.

Cousin T: (Still nodding, the smile gives way)

First, Edna writes, "That boy can use my bedroom, but he'd best not leave boot prints all over my chenille bedspread. And you tell him there will be heck to pay if I find he's tracked sawdust into my bedroom."

Cousin T: (Eyes narrowing)

Second, never leave the toilet seat up, since Margie doesn't wear her glasses to go to the bathroom and she might get stuck if she doesn't look before sitting down.

Cousin T: (Eyes widen)



Here are the other rules:

Clean out the tub if you shower.

Cousin T: (Eyebrow goes up)

No leaving empty beer cans on the porch railing.

Cousin T: (Another follows)

No cussin', spittin', scratchin', or belchin'.

Cousin T: (Head tilts forward)

Edna: I don't want to come back and learn that he's been using my garter belts as tool belts. He best stay out of my chifferobe too.

Cousin T: (Audible noise from the throat)

Margie: Never fear, Cousin T. Edna isn't here so make yourself to home. What Edna doesn't know won't hurt us. Want some special tea now?

Cousin T bolts for the kitchen.

Margie: Alone At Last

Margie here. So many people have asked me what Edna, my sister, is really like so I'm here to tell you. I have a pitcher of Special Tea and Edna has gone to old Biddy's so I can do as I please.

The first thing I did was dig the Miami Herald out of the garbage. I saw Edna reading it and marking attractions she'd like to visit. Lord a mercy! I had to cover my eyes several times. Edna is shameless.

I'm ashamed to say my sister first went to this section called Voyeur. Heavens above! She has circled where it says, "400+ Nightclubs." I know Edna well enough to know she'll try to visit as many of them as she can. Edna is a hussy.

My stars! Would you look at these shops she's circled? She'll go down there and spend every dime she's got. She doesn't care that her sister is sitting here and can barely afford to cook a pot of beans! Edna is selfish.

Finally, I see Edna has circled all the beaches. I suppose she thinks everybody has a great interest in seeing her old wrinkled tushie spread out all over the place. Edna in a bathing suit is a sight best left unseen. Edna is an idiot!

I can't take anymore. The thought of my sister cavorting in Miami is enough to make me barf. I'm going to Bailey's and get a smooth drink to coat my churning stomach.

Edna is on her own.

Edna goes on vacation

Edna: Margie, do you remember that letter from Aunt Biddy that I got a couple weeks ago?

Margie: Edna, I am not interested in any old letter from Biddy. You know Daddy was ashamed to say she was his sister. She is a hooligan.

Edna: You're just saying that because you know she never did like you. It's just as well, really. I gave her a call, and she invited me down to Florida to visit her. You know she lives in Miami Beach now. She told me to tell you that you're not invited.

Margie: Edna, if you go see that crazy Biddy then don't you think you'll be coming back here to live. I'll not have it! Do you hear me? This is the end of the line.

The very idea! Where's my Special Tea? Go on, Edna. Good riddance I say. Don't let the door hit you on your way out!

Edna: Calm down, Margie, you're going to bust a blood vessel with all that shouting! Now, you know you wouldn't have any fun down in Florida anyway, you always complain about the bugs and the heat. And just you try and keep me from coming home again; maybe I'll have so much fun in Florida I won't want to come back.

Aunt Biddy told me she'd send her youngest girl to come get me and drive me down to Miami Beach on the Biddy bus. You remember her girl, Itty-Biddy, don't you?

Itty-Biddy

The Biddy Bus

Margie: Holy Smokes! Lawsy mercy. Itty is a scary sight, Edna. If that's the kind of company you want to keep then you go right ahead. You're taking your life in your hands if you get in that Biddy bus!

Mark my words, Edna, no good can come from this trip. Well, unless you decide to stay. You best look out for Biddy's boys too. Hoodlums.

Edna: Margie, you'd better get ready for me to be gone, Itty-Biddy will be here tomorrow and I'm going to be on that Biddy Bus when it leaves town. Oh, I'm going to have such fun down in Florida. You behave while I'm gone, you hear?

Margie: If something happens to me while you're gone, Edna, try not to feel guilty. Goodbye Edna.


*photo courtesy of Photobucket

Margie and Edna love the Midlife Gals

Edna: Margie, take a look-see at this blog, it's the funniest thing I've seen in a long time! These two sisters write about their life and their relationship as sisters--my lands, that reminds me of another blog I know...

Margie: Edna, they remind me of us when we were their ages. I just wish you were as funny as they are, I guess it's hard to be funny when you're a shameless hussy.

Edna: Could you stop insulting me for once and pay attention? I love these two gals and their take on sisterhood, and on life in general. Do you think they know how funny they are?

Margie: I certainly hope they know how funny they are. We surely know how funny we are.

Edna, why do you think they seem to get along better than we do?

Edna: I'm going to guess it's because they actually like each other. I just tolerate you, you old shrew.

Margie: Edna, thank goodness you're leaving on vacation. If you weren't, you'd be dead as soon as I could find my poison.

Edna: I'm going to ignore you Margie, since I am a classy lady. I'm just going to tell our readers to go over and check out the antics of SalGal and KK at their blog. They always make me smile, especially on the days that I have to deal with you at your most ornery.

*not the Midlife Gals ;)

Exclusive: Jennie Sword Visits The Basement

Margie and Edna are pleased to announce an exclusive interview with Jennie Sword. Jennie is known quite fondly to "Jericho" fans as "Townie Jennie," an extra on the CBS series. She was kind enough recently to sit down and answer questions from two nosy old ladies. Thank you, Jennie!

+++++++++++++++++++

Edna: Jennie dear, you remind me so much of someone who lives here in Jericho, although we haven't seen much of her lately. There was this quiet young lady, very sweet, who used to wander around town—you usually saw her in crowds and such. You two look an awful lot alike, you wouldn't happen to be related to her, would you?

Jennie: You must be talking about my cousin Jessie! Yeah, my grandmother always said we look alike. I hope she's well. You know she's been through a lot in that town. Getting caught up in mortar attacks and battles with her neighboring town and all. She's a sweet person who tries to help others when she can. We gotta get her away from her horses and helping those nice people long enough to find her a good boyfriend. Would be nice for the girl to have someone nice to lean on after all she's been through there.

Margie: Miss Jennie, when Edna and I come visit you in California, what favorite spots of yours would you like to show us? Could you take us to meet April Parker-Jones and all the single gentlemen you know?

Jennie: Oh, yes April and I would love to take you ladies to a nice lunch or dinner. I'd love to take you to places like Griffith Park Observatory and surrounding areas there like the Equestrian Center. Do you ladies like horses? I could take you riding. We could go to the beach and there are several botanical gardens I know of that I think you both would love. Lots of museums too. The Huntington Gardens has both a museum and huge botanical garden and an English tea room I think you'd enjoy. We could go to the Getty Museum and the Getty Villa. Maybe take in a good play at a nice theatre. There are plenty of Hollywood "hot spots" we could take you to if you want to enjoy some nightlife. There's a lot we could do!

Single men? Well, there's plenty of them here but the good ones are hard to find because they are usually already taken or gay or when you think you find a good one, often they end up having some kind of "issues" that need some work but there are some random gems hidden around here. So maybe with some luck we can find a couple of those gems for you ladies to meet!

Edna: My sister and I are great fans of creative people. I understand that you are an actress, but do you have any other creative outlets? Is there anything in particular that you're working on now?

Jennie: Oh Edna, I have many! I've explored several of my creative sides from painting and drawing to doing digital visual effects to dancing but currently, I enjoy writing screenplays, playing score music on piano and doing nature and art photography. I also enjoy my garden which I find is also a creative outlet. I have a thing for the English cottage style gardens so I like to play around with that. I've been doing a little of all of those things lately. I recently had a new idea for a screenplay so I wrote an outline for it. I'm also taking up archery but that's more of a sport I'd say. I stay pretty busy!

Margie: Jennie, I was once told I could be a movie star but things didn't work out. When you make a movie who would you most like to have as your male lead? Do you think I could still make it in the movies?

Jennie: Hands down - Johnny Depp! I've loved his acting since I can remember. I think he's so naturally gifted and he takes risks and does things his way which is a lot like I tend to do. I love his choices on which projects he wants to be involved in. He'd be so fun to work with. So creative - I think he would understand my way of working and thinking. He's the coolest thing since sliced bread! Talented, beautiful, an amazing father and partner to his girl. Inspiring all around.

Oh yes Margie, it's never ever ever too late to follow a dream! Dreams happen at any time in life. Dreams can evolve. Whether it's a new dream or a life long dream you should go for it!!! Anything is possible if you believe in yourself and in what you want to do and put your heart and mind to it and work for it. You have to love yourself too! Know that you deserve to reach that goal that your heart so desires and live in the moments that lead you there!


You are lovely ladies. Thank you for your kindness and support! Best wishes to you both!
~ Jennie ~

Margie, Edna, and Superman

Edna: Margie, do you remember the old Superman show that used to be on the television? I'm sure you do, that George Reeves was a handsome son of a gun. I've been reading a book about his life and how he died--I swan, I haven't read anything so torrid since I read your diary!

Margie: I most certainly do remember George, Edna. A man that handsome was sure to have torrid romances. The same was true of me in my day.

What happened to George?

Edna: Well, I'm sure you remember that awful scandal when the poor man died back in 1959. People said then that he killed himself, because he was depressed that he couldn't get acting work after playing Superman for so long. Nobody took the poor man seriously as an actor after that television show.

But, the authors of this book seem to think that he might have been murdered. My lands, he was mixed up in all kinds of things, not the least of which was an affair with a married lady! Some people think maybe the mob killed him, but no one will ever really know for sure because most of the people who were involved in the scandal are dead now. Plus, he was cremated, so it's not like they can do some fancy-schmancy forensics work on his remains, like on that CSI show.

Margie: My stars! Maybe that married lady's husband killed him. The mob could have done it too. I dated one of those Mafia types once and you don't mess with them, Edna.

Do you think it was murder or suicide? I wish we could call Sherlock Holmes. I bet he'd know.

Edna: I don't rightly know which one it was, although this book makes a strong case for murder. He'd recently broken up with his married girlfriend, whose husband had possible ties to the Mafia. I guess she didn't take the break-up well and was stalking him. The authors think it's possible she took a hit out on him.

But, they also talk about how despondent he was about not getting the kind of work he wanted, like in movies. I guess he really didn't like being Superman, which is kind of sad, since that's what he was best known (and loved) for.

I don't think we'll ever know which one it was for sure, but it just goes to show that you never can tell what's just below the surface--maybe especially in Hollywood.

Margie and Edna Get An Award

We were honored to receive this award from Carols Personal Blog and we thank her for it.


"The "Arte y Pico" award was created and to be given to bloggers who inspire others with their creative energy and their talents, whether it be writing, artwork in all media's. When you receive this award it is considered a "special honor". Once you have received this award, you are to pass it on to at least 5 others."


Here are the 5 bloggers we are passing this award along to.


We love pretty pictures and Kathy Libby has beautiful landscape and nature photos.
KML Photography


We love everything that this blogger makes, especially her bags! Every time she displays her newest sewing project, it makes us want to learn how to sew. But for now, we'll just have to content ourselves with lusting after her sewing skills.
The Sewing Mom


I'm not a crafty type person but this blog makes me wish I was. It's very well-written and informative.
The Craft Therapy

This blogger performs a multitude of services, all so the rest of us don't have to. From getting a kitten to having scoliosis, she does it all. And she does so with such great humor and aplomb, it's always a treat to read about her experiences, even the not-so-great ones.
I Do Things


This blog provides a wonderful service to people and animals alike. Get the latest fitness news and see some animal videos. And her Entrecard card makes us laugh every time we see it.
Buddy's Fitness