Plant a Flower Day

 

Margie: Today is Plant A Flower Day. Edna, we'd best get outside and do some planting because you know what Mama always said. Mama said a house is nekkid without flowers. I think I'll plant some pretty roses. What about you, sister? More stinkweed this year?

Edna:  Perhaps some hemlock, sister dear.

Margie: Poor Mama would be so ashamed of you, God rest her Soul.

Edna:  At least I'm not a hypocrite like some sisters I could name.  You are anything but a pretty rose, Margie.  More like a dandelion, popping up where they're not wanted.

Margie: Right back at you, idjit!

No-See-Ums

Margie: Edna, I was just in the garden gathering some cucumbers. I'm telling you these mosquitos are awful this year. They bite me day and night. They've done that since I was a little girl.

I looked them up on Giggle and it says they like sweet things. That must be true, Edna, because I'm one of the sweetest things around. Do you think that's why they bite me?

Edna: Margie, your capacity for self-delusion is truly astounding. The only time you were the sweetest thing around was when you made that lemonade and forgot to add the sugar.

But I'll tell you what, I can't stand those little biting no-see-ums either. I'm not going outside again this summer without some of my Avon Skin-So-Soft, that stuff is amazing for keeping bugs from biting.

Margie: I needed some repellent too so I borrowed some change off your dresser.

Edna, you think you're so smart so answer a question. I know about no-see-ums but how do people know they exist if you can't see um? Is it possible to turn a person into a no-see-um?

Edna: Oh Margie, how I wish it were.

M&E plan their spring garden

Edna: Margie, we're running late on our garden planning this year, what with all the partying we've been doing lately. My lands, but we need to get a move on if we're going to have anything planted! I know Cousin T will help us with whatever we need outside, but I think we'd best decide what we want to grow before we start him to work. For myself, I think we should put in a few heirloom vegetables. I've got a hankering to grow me some purple tomatoes this year.

Margie: Whatever you do, Edna, don't give Cousin T any Special tea until he's finished making our rows. Lord a mercy, they went every which-a-way last year.

I'm planting red tomatoes and corn plus some peanuts. We need beans too, Edna, and a herb garden.

Edna: An herb garden is a very good idea, I just love the smell of lemon verbena. I also think we should set an area aside just for some flowers. Zinnias and sunflowers are always a cheerful addition to any garden.

Oh, and look, I found a plant that we can grow in your honor. It's called Devil's Claws. Hee!

Margie: Edna, you are not funny. I'm salting a ring around the garden to keep demons like you out.

I'll also plant some tall, pretty flowers so I don't have to look at your face.

Edna: Fine by me, since that means I won't have to see you either.

I'm looking forward to some homegrown vegetables this season, Margie. Go call Cousin T and tell him that we'll pay him in cookies if he helps us with our garden, okay?

Margie: Only if you use your own money to buy the cookies, Edna.

Edna: Does that mean you're buying the seeds, you cheapskate?

Margie: Sure, Edna, if you can loan me some cash.

Edna: Oh good Lord, I am not getting into this argument with you in front of our readers! I swan, Margie, sometimes you have the manners of a toad. Just call Cousin T and we'll talk about this later, you hear me?

Margie and Edna: Blogs We Love

Margie: Edna, I do love reading a good blog. One of my favorites is called Obscure History. It's not about you although you are the most obscure piece of history I can think of.

Edna: Never you mind about my age, dagnabbit, just tell our readers about the blog!

Margie: This blog has stories about little known events in history plus some thoughts about current events. You should read it.

Pearls of wisdom about little known facts/events in history and day to day life. A little social commentary on current events is also possible to be found here as well.

Edna: Oh my, that does look interesting. I’ll have to start spending more time there.





Margie: Here's another favorite of mine, Edna. I love this pretty cottage. I can see myself living there with 12 animals because they'd be a lot friendlier than you.

This blogger is very creative and I think we could be good friends. Anybody who loves animals and writing is fine by me.

Edna: Oh, I love that site, too! She posts pictures from her garden too, and they are always just lovely. You know, Mama always said that people with green thumbs have a special heart, and I agree.